Posted by: Dennie | September 10, 2012

Today’s Topic: Beware—Babylon

I am not computer savvy. While I’m able to navigate the web, use some Microsoft applications (??? correct use?), and putter around WordPress, when it comes to the nitty gritty, I get nervous, grumpy and generally wigged out.

That’s how I was most of  the weekend. It started like this:

My phone is due for an upgrade. Two years ago, I broke down and traded my little old  Razr for an iphone, and it’s taken nearly all that time to get used to it. But when my husband, who always wants the newest and the best, discovered I could upgrade, we “stopped to look.”   And I ended up with the iPhone 4S. Not quite sure how that happened since I was “just looking.”  But it is very similar to the 3S, with a few new bells and whistles that I don’t need to learn right away.

Regardless, setting it up and changing everything over was a time consuming pain. Frustrated and pissed off,  I wasn’t in the best frame of mind when I needed my laptop to synch the phone. Upon signing on, I discovered that my  Google page had been replaced by something called Babylon. What the hell?  Attempts to remove it failed and subsequent internet research revealed that it’s language translation software. It invaded my computer through some other source and has now priority as my main search engine.  Sunday afternoon and evening were an effort in futility as I tried everthing  to eradicate the devil. Online help was useless as well  suggesting I try  to access my registry, with fair warnings that I could do a real botch job on the system. Too scary. Shutting it down, I told myself to let it go, hoping  that tomorrow the tech guy at work may have a fix.

3am. An animal outside my bedroom window wakes me from a light sleep. As I lay there  listening to him rattle the wind chimes in the tree, I can’t stop my brain from going  to Babylon. Is it a virus? Will I need to get a new computer? Can the techie  kid fix it? I toss. I turn. The time ticks by and I do not get back to sleep. Finally at 4:45, I get up, dress and go to the gym, hoping it will help to clear my head.

8am. I arrive at work, laptop in hand. First things first. Email the techie and ask for help. Miraculously, an hour later, he strolls in. Big smile. “Don’t worry, ” he says, “this happens all the time. It’s an easy fix.”

I breathe a sigh of relief.

“It’s not a virus?” I say.

“Oh, no. Just a pain to deal with.”

He takes my laptop, starts it up. A few clicks here, a couple of deletions there and voila!

“It’s gone, ” he proclaims. It took him less than two minutes.

I thank him profusely, so grateful for the computer whizzes of the world who rescue me when I need it.

“No problem,” he says, and with a wave, is gone.

 But when my boss leaves the office  thirty minutes later, I can’t stand it. I need to see for myself that Babylon is indeed gone and Google comes up when I sign in.

Laptop open and on. Sign in. Connect to workplace internet. Go to the web.

BABYLON….

SHIT!!!

Anyone have any suggestions?

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