Posted by: Dennie | July 15, 2013

Chapter 7–Take A Chance

I have never met Diane Conway. But she knows me. She writes all about me in her book. I open it to a page-any page-and there I am. It’s a little freaky, scary even, because I’ve never–that I remember anyway–spoken with the lady. But she knows me. Yes she does.

I’m not reading her book from front to back, I peruse. So tonight, I thumbed to Chapter 7 and the first story, “Permission Slips.”  A quote from Frederick Wilcox begins the anecdote. “Progress always involves risk, you can’t steal second with your foot on first.”  I like that.  In the following two and a half short pages, Diane ( I can call her that because she knows me, read on)  discusses waiting for the right time, the perfect circumstance to plunge ahead and pursue a dream, follow a yearning, act upon an idea.  As youngsters in school, we were required to have permission slips, signed by a parent or guardian, which would allow us to participate in a sport, go on a field trip, take a different bus home with a friend. As adults, she says, (and this is how I know she knows me) we may get stuck waiting for a permission slip to inhabit the life we were meant to lead. Whoa. This is the scary part. I ask my Higher Power on a regular basis to show me the life for which I was created. To reveal my purpose. Not that I have an unhappy life, quite the opposite. I am extremely content. But I frequently get this feeling that I’m not fulfilling what I’m meant to achieve. It’s an almost physical longing for an unidentifiable something. And I’ve been waiting to be shown what it is. Diane knows that.

In eight days I will be fifty seven years old. I’m starting to figure out that if this “something” is going to be revealed, I damn well better start looking for it myself. It obviously isn’t going to come knocking on my door.

So here I am, beginning with small steps– this blog, and The Warrior Dash. These have given me a sense of purpose over the last week or so. My email has been filled daily with notifications that reference one or both of these ventures; a comment on my blog or, even better, a follower. Donations contributing to my fundraising goal for St Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital. I’m feeling an excitement that I haven’t felt in a long time. Accomplishment. That’s what it is. It feels good.

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” Anais Nin.


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